Posted 3 days ago

emiello:

Pros of dating me

  • i’m rly soft and squishy
  • i’ll make you hot beverages in bed
  • i’m good at compliments
  • you’ll gain lots of dorky pet names

Cons of dating me

  • ummm??
  • zero i am a goddess
Posted 3 days ago
Posted 3 days ago

cistro:

Am i a womfn? Am i a womfn?

Posted 3 days ago
Posted 3 days ago

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.

You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

(Source: never-let--it-die)

Posted 3 days ago

robotsquid:

"MAN THIS STORY I’M WRITING IS GONNA BE SO GOOD I’M SO PUMPED"

"I CAN’T WAIT TO DEVELOP THE SHIT OUT OF THESE CHARACTERS"

"HOT DAMN THAT ONE SCENE NEAR THE MIDDLE IS GONNA BE BITCHIN’"

"THIS PLOT TWIST IS THE SINGLE BEST IDEA I’VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE"

~one hour later~

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Posted 3 days ago

chraystmaseve:

omgoswin:

kylesbogusjourney:

Female privilege is getting to claim a headache to avoid sex.

Female oppression is having to claim physical illness to avoid sex because men won’t take a simple fucking “no” for an answer.

Female oppression is men being so entitled that they think being denied sex is oppressive.

 #OOOO FUCKING OWND YOU GOT FUCKING SLAM DUNKED SON YOU’RE GONNA NEED LIKE TEN FEDORAS TO COVER THAT BRUISE FUCKNUTS

Posted 4 days ago

wreckitronnie:

wreckitronnie:

Listening to music older than you are
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Listening to only Top 40 Hits

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Listening to Obscure Underground music nobody knows about

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Bashing someone for their taste in music

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Creating a false sense of superiority based on music choice

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Applejuice

image

everytime this post comes back an angel gets its wings

Posted 4 days ago

studiioghibli:

Princess Mononoke + Kodamas

Posted 4 days ago

dutchster:

why do shampoo bottles weigh hardly anything but when you drop them in the shower they turn into a meteor

Posted 4 days ago
Posted 4 days ago

rats-oncrackattack:

I found a baby pug at the pet store, she was everything I imagined and more.


Help.

Posted 4 days ago

kurome-yatsufusa:

altairyourhairoutbitch:

do you ever have a notp that you antiship so hard that you actually get nauseous when people mention it

https://31.media.tumblr.com/0cd20d0df4c9851b64e3c766b8af993a/tumblr_inline_n1z9u5FXQc1rssn1f.gif

Posted 5 days ago

stunningpicture:

Perfect timing of waves cresting.

Posted 6 days ago

thatsmebarbara:

Ellie Goulding - Sweet Disposition (Temper Trap Cover)